Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
I have post one night stand depression
Randomize
