Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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