I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
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