I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
Randomize
