"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
Randomize
