I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
you will always have a special place in my vag
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
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