Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
Febreezed myself at a stop light on the way to the IRS office. Judgmental glare from some old lady in the car next to me, thumbs up from her husband.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
Randomize