Having a random hookup so left but love u
I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
Why can't burritos get me drunk
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
Randomize
