your thong is hanging out like whoa
Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
two words: eviction party
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
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