I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
Randomize
