what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize
