a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
Randomize
