First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
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