Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
