Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
Randomize
