i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
i think im in europe. pls send help
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
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