i jhust puked up my retainher.
So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Randomize
