Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
Randomize
