i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
Randomize
