all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
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