Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
Dude my date hates me, Im on a rooftop full of Turkish people, and Ricky Martin is blasting on the radio. I was wrong earlier when I said I have my shit together
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
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