I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
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