I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Randomize
