theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
Randomize
