we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
What were you even doing out there at 2 a.m.?
Look, i had a gallon of lemonade, a pack of smokes and a Darth Vader voice changer. What did you EXPECT me to do?
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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