WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
