Just fell off a train. Bad.
I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
Randomize
