he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
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