what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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