when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
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