Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
This dress was meant to end up on your floor
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Randomize
