Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
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