What did we do last night that was yellow?
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Randomize
