I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
