..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
