i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
you made out with another girl for some wings
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
