; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
Randomize
