just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
I just had a horrible epiphany. I have fucked girls younger than Star Tours
This text was so worth waking up to
MY TWIN SISTER IS ENGAGED. I REPEAT, MY SCREW UP OF A SISTER IS ENGAGED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'll be there in 20 with vodka.
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
Randomize
