So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
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