I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
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