She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
