these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
My bar tender texts me around 5ish and ask what I feel like, so it's ready for me when I get home. All star service.
Dude. You are the LAST person that should live above a bar.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
Randomize
