but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
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