last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
