I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
Randomize
