So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize