508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Randomize
