hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
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