just come out here and I will go home with you...
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
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