I woke up at 11 this morning in my car parked in front of the bar.
I know, I tried to wake you up, but I couldnt. So I walked home
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
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