I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
Randomize
